With a little over a week until I get married, I’ve found myself reflecting a lot lately. If you know me, you know I work a lot. It’s not like me to spend much time in reflection — I’m usually looking forward, moving ahead. But Jamie and I have been together for nearly nine years now, and one of my biggest takeaways is just how much I’ve grown in that time.

Back in 2016, we were both just kids. In some ways, even in our mid-30s, we still are — but we’ve grown a lot, both of us. When my last relationship ended, I didn’t know it then, but it was for the better. 2016 was one of the hardest years of my life for more reasons than I care to unpack here, but in that same year I had arguably the best summer of my life. I learned who truly mattered, who didn’t, made friends I still have today, and started one of the most surreal jobs anyone could imagine — one I still hold to this day.

The day before 2016 began — New Year’s Eve — I met Jamie. I didn’t know it then, but she’d become one of the most important people I’d ever meet: my closest friend, my true partner, and in just over a week — nearly ten years after that first meeting — my wife.

When I proposed to Jamie on Christmas Day in 2023, I didn’t expect anything to really change. We’d already built a life together. But in the months since, I’ve realized things do feel different. My perspective has shifted — on myself, the people around me, and especially my relationship with Jamie. A boss and friend asked me recently if I thought marriage would change anything. At first, I almost said no, but instead I found myself admitting: “I’ll probably cool it on the partying, and give Jamie even more of the respect she deserves, since she’ll be my wife after all.” Not that I’ve been disrespectful, but I can get carried away when I drink. Truthfully, that’s less of an issue now — we’ve both slowed down on drinking these last few years — but still, it was an honest answer.

At the end of the day, Jamie and I already share a life. We’ve owned a house together for nearly five years, we’ve built a business together, and I’ve been part of raising her daughter, Payton, since she was nine. Now she’s 18, driving her own car, working full-time — and I still can’t believe how fast that’s happened. All this to say: Jamie and I already are partners. Getting married is just making it “government official” (a little more official than Facebook official 😅). People already call her my wife, and honestly, I’ve been saying it more often too.

I’m excited. Sure, maybe not much will change day-to-day, and that’s fine. We’ve got a good life. We look out for each other. We argue sometimes, but less so in recent years — and when we do, it’s because we care. You don’t fight for things you don’t believe in.

We balance each other in all the right ways. We see the world differently, but together we see more. At 36, I couldn’t have imagined a better partner to marry than Jamie. Marriage won’t change who we are — it’s a continuation of the life we’ve built — but it does mark the start of every year still to come, and I can’t wait.